Tag Archives: dumb

Subway has got to be kidding me with these ‘flatizza’ commercials

When I started this blog, I never imagined I would devote any time to dumb TV commercials. But ever since March Madness started I’ve basically been watching TV for 12 straight hours a day and have seen plenty¬†of dumb commercials. The KFC ‘selfie’ commercials are pretty bad and absolutely relentless (there’s a new one every week it seems like), but these Subway commercials are in a class of their own.

First of all, where does Subway get off acting like they invented flatbread pizza? 10 seconds of Googling tells me some chick blogged a recipe for it over 2 years ago. You didn’t invent shit Subway.¬†Unless by ‘invent’ you mean you combined the two words of something that already exists to pass it off as new. If that’s all invent means than I just invented a new sandwich. It has bacon, lettuce, and tomato and I call it the bacletto. This new and completely original sandwich was invented by me and only available at my restaurant.

Secondly, if Subway just came out and said “Pizza places are making sandwiches so we’re making pizzas now. Gotta diversify nigga”, I would have 1000% more respect for them. Completely missed the opportunity to get the Wu-tang Clan back on the air and that is straight up unforgivable.